4/4 All Done! Sept-Dec

     Well, shit. Happy New Year guys! May the odds be ever in your favor for this year. I can't believe this year is over, but also it went super fast. Honestly, I don't think 2020 was that bad, obviously, I can see how for others this year was a total dumpster fire (as some have called it). Losing loved ones would've made this year a lot harder. I feel for families that are going through that and want to send all the good vibes to them. This year was really transformational for me, I am a completely different person than I was a year ago, and I worked my ass off to achieve that. At the beginning of the year, I didn't like my job or my relationships, I didn't like my life and I didn't like myself. There was a point where I decided enough was enough, I don't want to be miserable. I don't think anyone wants to be miserable, but I think a lot of people don't have the mindset that you don't have to be. It's your life, this is your life. As far as I know, you only get one, so why not make it incredible? Why not do the things that you've always wanted to do? Why not be happy? We all deserve that. When I started this journey I never imagined what it could actually do. I never thought about how massive of an impact it would actually have on me. I quit that job, I broke free from those relationships, and I created a life that I'm proud of and a future I'm excited about. I fucking love the person I am today. She still needs work but I'm proud of her. That being said, let's get into it!

    As always starting with finances. I ended the year with $3,984 saved up. I say this every time, but that so cool. Like I was actually able to do that. I've been struggling with finances for so long that this is just incredible to me. I didn't reach my $5,000 goal but I'm fine with that. Life happens and life gets pricey sometimes and that's fine. I currently owe just over 9k on my car which means I've paid off close to $4,000 of it this year. I started the year with $14,407 in total debt and all I have left is 9k on my car. that's insane. That feels so freaking good. Having gone from over $40k to $9k that's amazing.

    As far as hiking, the weather pretty trash here right now, and it's colder than a witch's tit, so hiking didn't really happen. Jeremy and I went on a bunch of walks around town. We went up to Western's campus and walked around there. It's gorgeous up there and it was pretty neat to see where my babe is going to school. 

This is at Western on 12/10

This one is from one of our walks around town, these two own my heart.

    I started school in October and maybe the novelty just hasn't worn off yet but I still think it's fantastic. There were some bumps in the road, bumps being my entire English class (read about that here), other bumps being dealing with things like financial aid, because that is something that just can't be easy apparently.

    I had 7 fall-themed things on my list and we did 6 of them. The one that we didn't do was go on a hayride, I'm not sure that places were doing them because of covid. The first thing we did was go apple picking on October 7th. Both Jeremy and I and never done this before, but it was actually a lot of fun. I definitely think we will do it again next year. 

    On October 14th, we used those apples to make an apple pie. A vegan apple pie! Well actually two pies, there were a lot of apples. This pie was so flippen good! I feel like our vegan one tasted better than just regular apple pie. We made it again for Thanksgiving.

She's a beaut!

    Next, we went and killed two birds with one stone. We went to the pumpkin patch and walked the corn maze there. This was on October 16th. This took a couple attempts, the day that we first planned to go we drove all the way other there just to find out it was closed... The second time we got there and they told us they only accepted cash, so then we had to go get cash. We got there eventually.

   

 We then of course we carved those pumpkins, and we straight up deserve trophies for these masterpieces. 

So good!

    And then last, but not least, we of course dressed up for Halloween. We did it a day late but it's not like anyone had Halloween plans this year anyway so who cares. Of course, I dressed Jackson up again this year, last year he was Dobby. His ears really decide what costume he gets. So this year he was Scooby-Doo. My sister made a tag for his collar and it was cute as shit. We dressed up to match the meddling kids' theme and went as Velma and Shaggy. Low key... Nah, high key we pulled it off.

        I had a similar list of things that I wanted to do for the winter. This list had 6 items on it and again we did all but one. The one being "kiss under mistletoe" I couldn't find any mistletoe. I still really want to do this because it's cute and it's a Christmas staple. Bath and body works have this candle and they only sell it in the wintertime and sometimes they don't even sell it then because they're kinda trash. That's not the point. The point is that I love this candle, so this year it was on my list to get it. I went to the mall a few times and sure as shit they didn't have it. The lady there pointed out another candle similar to it, but it wasn't my candle. Don't get me wrong I still bought that one because it smelled amazing, but I also went home and ordered mine online. If your wondering it's the "Black tie" candle. It straight up smells like delicious men's cologne and I live for it. The next thing we did was send Christmas cards, which is another thing I've never done before. I didn't want to just buy some generic cards from the store though, not that there's anything wrong with that. I'm just extra as fuck and wanted to show it. So I sweet-talked my mom into doing a photoshoot of the three of us (Doing a photoshoot was another item on my love life list). Then I went onto Shutterfly and created super cute Christmas cards! And of course, we sent them to all of our loved ones. 

This is the front side.

And this is the back. I wanted this picture on the back so Jacksons' existential crisis would be enlarged.

    Since I get such a killer discount at my store... It only made sense that I would buy our gingerbread houses there. Also, we're indecisive as shit so we ended up getting both the traditional gingerbread house complete with gingerbread man and gingerbread tree and also a cookie train that we could build. We made the train first. this is the Nestle brand. This is a name brand. This is bougie shit. This is extra. And it was missing HALF the pieces ya'll. The fuck happened in their factory? So since I wasn't about to be the customer to bring something back to my own store, we improvised. We made it work. I just talked shit about the product with my boss afterward, and she thought it was hilarious. Anyway, after we finished that, which of course didn't take very long... We built the basic-ass-drug-store-brand gingerbread house. Luckily my brand came through and we were able to build at least one complete structure. Honestly, though it was a lot of fun. I haven't built a gingerbread in I don't even know how long. It turned out pretty cute.

I don't think we're winning any contests anytime soon but it's not bad.

    We also did some Christmas baking! Most of the women in my family do this every year, I've just never been one of them. Until this year! I'm definitely going to continue to do it. That shit is fun. We made a lot of stuff. I made ginger snaps, which were bomb if I don't say so myself. I also made dream bars which are my favorite thing that my family makes. They are chocolate marshmallow bars and they're so good!!!! I also tried to make shortbread cookies, but they didn't turn out so... Jeremy made haystacks and what his family calls reindeer turds. Reindeer turds kinda remind me of cake balls, but instead of cake it's ground-up Oreos mixed with cream cheese and it's amazing!

    We went to look at Christmas lights as well. We actually did this twice. The first time we drove around a gated community that has a really nice display every year. We drove until we ended up downtown and there weren't a whole lot of lights there but we found a giant Christmas tree!

   Believe it or not, I had never been to a farmers market before this year. I feel like farmers markets are just hippie as shit and I'm hippie as shit so why have I not been to one before! We went to the one in Olympia and it was a bit spontaneous. Once ours opens up in town I definitely want to go check them out.

    Indulging in a smoothie bowl was another first for me. Robeks has become a staple. The shit is so good. The mahalo mango smoothie with chia seeds and spirulina... Straight up heaven in a cup. I had a goal to try 10 new restaurants this year and I achieved that. I don't know if Robeks counts but oh well. The new restaurants I tried during the last few months are; On Rice (I ordered a curry which was dumb because I can't handle spice worth a damn), Fiama Burger (They have poutine and I miss my countries cuisine with a burning passion), Brandy Wine Kitchen (This is a bougie ass vegan's paradise and I live for it), D'annas (I've eaten here before but it was years ago), and then last and probably my new fav the Old World Deli. When I created this love life list I pictured myself eating exciting new food while sitting with good company at a table inside the restaurant. The Old World Deli is one that I was really excited to sit down in and I got really bummed out standing in the line to get my to-go order, knowing that I'd be eating it in the car. I've been trying not to let those "I wish things would go back to normal" or "If only this didn't happen" thoughts get in my head but occasionally they do. 

    Another item on my list was to go to a bakery because I haven't done that in a long time. I feel that I almost demonize sweets, desserts, and candy. I feel like I can't eat those things without feeling guilty about it or constantly worrying about calories or any of the bullshit. I don't let myself enjoy them and I wanted that to change this year. Eating that stuff all the time is obviously not good for you, too much sugar really does a number on your body. Maybe it's because I've seen what diabetes does to your body that I've developed a fear of them. But enjoying a brownie or a cookie or even a Nanaimo bar every once in a blue moon isn't going to hurt me. So that's just what I did.

    I had a lot of goals that involved doing 10 of something,  the next one to discuss is to do 10 DIYs. I only ended up doing 4 this year, but I also did I fair amount of painting. I decided to make my own magnets which I actually love!

I don't mean to toot my own horn, but those are cute as fuck. The cactus is my favorite.

    I also made my own macrame wall decor piece, made with driftwood that Jer and I found at the beach. I'm not a professional when it comes to creating macrame masterpieces but for my first attempt ever, I think it turned out pretty decent.

    My plant fam grew yet again, I did however lose my succulent. I overwatered it and I'd be lying if I said I didn't cry. But now I know that they don't need that much so I want to get another one and try again. The newbies are a Christmas cactus that I got from work and a peppermoia that I got for Christmas from Jer's aunt. The pot it's in is super cute!

    Another Christmas gift I got that I absolutely love is a Ukeuele from my babe. I've wanted one for so freaking long. I've already downloaded apps that can help me tune it and teach me how to play. I love it!!!

It's absolutely gorgeous too, He did good!

        I finished reading "The 5 Love Languages" By Gary Chapman. Honestly, I didn't feel like I really learned much from it. Granted it was nice to read about specific examples of what he was saying. It was still a good read. I'm currently reading "The Story of Stuff' by Annie Leonard. It's incredibly factual and I'm loving it. I find that I don't read more than a page or so at a time though because I only read at night and I've been doing so much during the day that by then I'm just completely wiped. 

    I watched three ted talks.

1. "3 Reasons You Are Not Doing What You Say You Will Do" By Amanda Crowell. This was a good one, she made some good points on how sometimes we don't go for things because we convinced ourselves that we don't deserve them when we really know that's not the truth.
2. "The Secret to Getting Anything You Want in Life." By Jennifer Cohen. I was on a motivation kick I guess. This one was also good, it was more of a just go do it message. She says that we just have to start asking for what we want otherwise we won't get it. She used getting a raise as an example if you feel that you deserve more money then ask for it. The worst that's going to happen is they say no. I think it's a good point though. Like let's use a birthday present for example if you know what you want for your birthday then you have to tell someone otherwise they won't know that you want it and you won't get it. Life is the same way.
3. "Do Not Ignore These 11 Things You Owe Yourself." By Ralph Smart. I thoroughly enjoy watching his content, he's pretty out there and probably not for everyone. I do think that a lot of people would benefit from watching some of his videos. I like this one because he talks about all the things that we so freely give to others but neglect to give to ourselves and it's really important to give ourselves those things. 

    I watched two documentaries as well, I had another two planned to watch but I didn't end up watching them before the year ended. I still want to watch them, one of them is like four hours long though

1. "Bowling for Columbine." This is a Michael Moore documentary which I'm discovering that I really enjoy. I think it's incredibly unfortunate however that this film exists at all because I don't believe school shootings should ever happen. 
2. "Addicted to food." This one wasn't what I thought it would be. I thought it was about a woman who was extremely overweight and then overcame it and had a healthier life. Instead, she ended up dying from malnutrition because she went so far the other way. So that was kind of a bummer. It's based on a true story so I feel bad for saying that it was kind of a sucky movie. I do like that it's out there though and that her story was told. 

    We made a shit ton of food. We've also transitioned into vegetarians. The goal is to go vegan eventually but we both understand that it's a process. I love that Jeremy and I are on the same page with food too, it makes it so much easier! I mean I'd still love him if he stuffed his face with steak but I'm really glad he doesn't. Changing your eating habits is just a lot easier when you have someone doing it with you. 

1. Creamy Acorn Squash. 8/10. This was really yummy but it gave me heartburn.
2. Homemade Alfredo. 8/10 Same with this one, I think it's the butter.
3. Vegan Sheppards Pie 7/10. It was tasty but it was too runny, we called it Sheppard's soup.
4. Vegan Apple Pie 10/10.
5. Vegan Chili. 10/10.
6. Cinnamon Rolls 10/10 Made on Thanksgiving morning. 
7. Sweet Potato Quinoa Bowls 10/10. These were dank.
8. Vegetarian Taco Casserole 10/10 One of my favorites for sure.
9. Tortilla Soup 11/10 We made this twice back to back because of how great it was.
10. Ginger Snaps 10/10.
11. Dream Bars 10/10.
12. Shortbread Cookies -1/10 Dude fuck these cookies.
13. Pizza 9/10 It stuck to the pan, but other than that it was pretty good.
14. Kale Bake 5/10 It was edible
15. Avocado Toast 10/10 I understand the hype.
16. Vegan Stir fry 10/10
17. Baked Sweet Potatoes. 10/10
18. Garlic Parm Brussel Sprouts 10/10
19. Ratatouille 7/10 It was good but it wasn't great
20. Carrot Cake Pancakes 8/10 These were pretty good but they gave us both heartburn. 

    I did a few things that weren't on my list that I feel like they should've been. Jeremy and I have only been together in the era of covid, so we haven't been on any "dates" like getting dressed up and going to a fancy restaurant and trying to figure out what the weird bougie shit on the menu is together. I can't wait to actually go on a dinner date with him, but for now, we improvised. We had an at-home date. We got dressed up, picked up some fancy restaurant take-out, and brought it home. He's so cute, we got candles and he arranged them in a heart!! I love him so much. 

    During one of our trips to visit his family, I got to witness his band jam out and I loved every second of it. First of all, he just looks cute as shit when he drums, he gets super into it and you can just tell that he's in his element. Also, his band is pretty freaking good. Shout out to The Gonzos go check 'em out on Instagram. 

    The last thing that wasn't on my list is to wrap my Christmas presents in sustainable wrapping paper. Most wrapping paper isn't recyclable and just goes to the landfill. I didn't want to be a part of that anymore. 

I honestly like the look of this way more anyway.

    As always I'll finish up with my favorite photos that I took these last few months. Some of the ones I've chosen don't have the more professional vibe that I try to get, they just make me happy. 

This one is my favorite one from our photoshoot, Obviously, I didn't take it. Photo creds to mom.

This is probably my favorite picture ever.

Fall foliage is my heart and soul.

This was supposed to be a more professional one but Jackson decide he was more important, he was right.

These ones are a little bit better though.

And then, of course, we have to have some Christmas/Winter Wonderland ones in here too.

    That's it, guys. That's my year of trying to figure it all out. Did it work? I think so. I think doing this was detrimental for me to get out of the headspace that I was in when I started. I'm genuinely sad that this is over, but I'm not going to stop just because it ended. I'm going to continue to better myself and figure it all out. If you're feeling stuck or unhappy with some or all aspects of your life then I would highly encourage you to try this. I'll have a blog coming up where I break it down and show you the actual pages of my love life list and of course if you have any questions I'd love to answer them. 

    Thank you all for going through this with me and supporting me in this journey. 

Love always, Courtney.